My boyfriend does not [update:did not] support what I do

By Anna

Working an independent life online is not always easy when you have a partner who does not support your idea.

I love what I do. I love working from home. I actually get exited to get up and do some work. It never actually feels like work because I enjoy it. When my partner watches tv, I just work because his tv watching bores me (usually sports) and I like being productive. I just like it.

The problem with me is that my partner does not agree with what I do because I am on the computer too much and I nearly bankrupted us because of a business that went belly up. On a positive note, I built-up my blogging business from $0 to $3000 per month in 9 months (not this site). It was in the last 3 months that its been making $2000-$3000 a month! I took me this long because I was working on MANY other projects at the same time. I was dipping my toes in freelancing, online stores, web development, SEO and travel. I was not focused 100% on blogging. To be honest I was not focused 100% on any of the projects. But writing a blog was in fact the one thing that I enjoyed doing the most. It was just not making me any real money so I always focused on money making tasks first – as in my e-commerce websites mainly or client work.

[1 Year UPDATE: oh how things have changed. It is hard when you love someone but they just stress you get a ‘job’ because they think it is the safe route. My partner now supports me 100% and I am engaged 🙂 I had to really prove to him that my business was working by showing him why I re-invest the money and how it all works. He now has a much better understanding of it and is much easier to deal with.]

This however left me with not much time for blogging. Now I want to focus on blogging more then all those other things. I know I can easily get a conventional job and earn a “normal” salary but that is not what I love. It is also hard for me because I have a partner that does not support what I do. Since I failed my last online store, he now wants me to leave my dreams and get a proper job. He feels like we will live on the poverty line if I do this because I am up and down when it comes to making money. When I work at a normal job I make decent salary. When I freelance it is up and down depending on how many clients I have. Basically to him, my lifestyle is financially unstable and he is having a hard time with my unstableness.

[UPDATE: Now he does not feel this way. Now he is happy because since then, I have earned heaps more money. Last month I earned $21,256 in ONE MONTH! He is very very happy now…]

The problem is, I am completely happy with my unstable income. He is not. He wants us to both make normal wages like a normal couple without kids would. This is his dream not mine. I want to work from home or work and travel. Even though I am just starting on this journey of “blogging”. I could make decent money programming or providing seo services, what I really want to do is blog. So here I am. Blogging. My other past time is setting up online stores but I just want to spend time on my blogging for now.

[UPDATE: Since that post, I did blog and make money and I also set up an e-commerce store and made even more money :)]

I do not have any concerns because I feel like if I had to then I can just fall back on getting a conventional job. I have done so many different kinds of jobs that I feel like I can take anything on. I mean how hard can it be. You just learn the job and get on with it.

At this time, for the last 3 weeks. I decided to really just focus more on my blogs and less on getting client work. I enjoy blogging more than working. So here I am. Blogging and loving it. It is a shame that my bf does not agree. He would agree if I was making more money right now. If I just got a job right now and made money and did this on the side. But that is not what I want to do. I know that I can make money blogging, anyone can! I proved it can be done once. I just need to make more of it so I can prove it again!. So this is my journey. This is my experience with blogging and life and how I am doing it all.

[Update March 2013: I am now making 8X the amount of money I was when I wrote this post. Find out how here.]

My boyfriend feels like why are you not settling for less money when you can just get a real job and be a normal person. I tell him it is because I want to do what I love and I believe that this will make me a normal salary and probably even more. He just does not get it or believe in me. Do you have any idea how hard it is to shield myself from his negativity. I believe it will work. He does not. I have to keep believing in myself even though my own partner does not. He wants to have a safe steady income. I guess safety is not really my strong suit. I like the risks. I love challenges and I have no need for keeping up with the Jones’.

This is what people who quit their jobs KNOW

The problem is people that quit their job KNOW they will have to make some sacrifices to be able to get where they want to. They KNOW they might not be able to afford drinking, nights out, whatever. Less trips, more work. They Know this. But the problem is by default their partners have to deal with it too. They have to live the same way because of their choices. In my case, my partner is wondering if this will be a whole lifetime. What is the upsite for him? It is a downside to him in his mind. If it turns out that one of my future projects makes 500k a year then that’s an upside for both of us but if its 50k that it turns out making then that is no upside for him. It would only be an upside for me because I am doing what I love and he has to wear the fact that we COULD be making a normal salary but instead he is making a safe normal salary and I am all over the place. So for this reason he cannot be supportive. He was supportive for a few years when my e-commerce business was doing well and we were making money, but now, the e-commerce business is on the way out, and it’s too much of a concern for him that we are not making enough money for what he wants to.

Because of me he cannot have the normal things in life. Like a house.

I guess we are quite different. We want different things. I also want a house eventually but it is not really a priority for me. I just want us to be happy. So because of this, what I will do is just get a job because my business is failing. Then eventually I will start blogging again.

Who knows, I might love my new job, meet new people and love that new life as well.

If your partner doesn’t support what you do then this is what you can do

1. Meet half way. Get a job but still work on your own stuff part time. This will get them off your back.

2. Ignore them & keep believing in yourself. You can do this. At the beginning is when you have to work the hardest. Set up mode is the hardest part but once you do that you create something called momentum & it’s easier from there, especially when you are creating residual income! The work you did at the start will continue to earn you money in years to come! Keep persevering.

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